Books R Dum is the seventh episode of Zombies VS Ninjas.


The ninjas were watching a commercial for Zombie Girls Gone Wild, where Spencer asks Tanzy if he could borrow $5000, but Tanzy refuses to give Spencer money to buy "trash." Spencer says that there's a difference and it has bloopers. Another commercial is advertising Colonel Flunkerton's Annual-Patriotic-Liberty-Freedom-Patriots-Community Barbecue & Book-Burning and is advertising a library full of irreplacable books to burn. Tanzy says that they have to save the books, but Spencer says that books are for "suckers that are too lazy to pick up a video game" and turns to Andre to agree. However, Andre disagrees saying he loves books, especially his childhood favorite, Little Bunny Hoppy-Hop Destroys the Capitalist Satan. Bartleby points out that there will be no books left, but Rogi says that there will be more room for strip clubs. However, Spencer and Rogi change their minds after seeing the large breasts on the librarian Debbie Decimal.

The ninjas arrive at the library, where Spencer starts hitting on Debbie. She complains that the building is surrounded, but Tanzy says that they can get the books out through the roof. Spencer says that he'll do it only if he gets a date. Debbie agrees, but says that she has to show everyone something. She takes off her head to reveal that she's actually a man. The librarian says that dressing up as a hot girl is the only way he could get help. Bartleby, Chris and Tanzy try to convince Spencer to continue to help, saying that future generations of readers are depending on them.

However, they get confused when they see that all the books are adult reading material. Tanzy suggests that they just bail, but Spencer and Rogi are saving the books knowing full well that all the books are pornographic. Tanzy still suggests that they leave, but Spencer starts using Tanzy's words against her just to save the porn. However, Colenel Flunkerton and a swarm of zombies break in, with Flunkerton setting one on fire. Tanzy kicks a zombie towards a bookshelf to burn it, where Spencer claims she did it on purpose. Chris and Bartleby do the same thing before the ninjas evacuate. Spencer at first refuses to leave, but he drops the books, grabs the librarian and escapes. On the roof, the librarian laments on the books being burned. Tanzy says that it's a chance to pursue a new rewarding life, but the librarian instead jumps off the roof. Andre says that he has something to make Spencer feel better. At home, Andre is reading to the ninjas Little Bunny Hoppy-Hop Destroys the Capitalist Satan, where Spencer asks, "Did she have big boobs!?"